Sunday 17 August 2014

Cold Like Me

Kiss me on the lips. Open your mouth. Let my frozen breath mix with yours.
Press your skin to mine. Hold it there. Feel your body shiver.
Murmur my name. Say that you love me. Listen to the silence of my response.

You shouldn't have let it come this far. Now you will get what you deserve. You may not realise it now, but you asked for this.
I warned you that I'm cold. I warned you over and over again. I told you I would break you. That I would tear your heart into pieces. You said that you didn't care. That you don't care. That there is nothing I can do that will stop you loving me. Do you see how pathetic you are?
You are clinging onto nothing.

Maybe you thought I was joking, or trying to be cute to encourage you on.
I wasn't. I was serious. I am serious. I will bring you down with me, one degree at a time.
We will do this thing that you wrongly call love all through the night. Over and over again you will convince yourself that I love you. That I was wrong. That this is something.
In the morning it will be over and I will be bored of you. You will cry, but frankly I don't care. I'm cold.
Cold and hard as ice.

Maybe you think that you are different, just like all the ones before you. Maybe you think you can change me. You think you can melt the icicles from my soul with the warmth of your love?
You can't. You won't have a chance. You wouldn't even have a chance if I wanted to let you try. There is no fixing me. There is no fixing someone this far gone. You are just a distraction, something to fill my time.

For the night I will get lost inside you. In the scent of your skin, the beat of your heart, and the light in your eyes. I'll forget myself in each physical moment. Then the sun will rise and I will forget you.
You might say that it means something. Those movements in the night. They don't. It wouldn't matter if it were you, or anyone else on the planet.You are all just my way of filling time.

I have so much time. I decided not to die, but now what?
What do I do with this life?
I have no interest in anything. I have no goals, no aims, no future.
So I might as well sit here in the dark with you and cool your fire against my heart.

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